BeyGoals- Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

“Historically, black women’s bodies have been utterly disrespected. We nurtured and fed other race’s children from our breasts. We were raped and bore children for slave masters. And yet, were made ashamed of our bodies, our curves, our blackness…-Adeea Rogers, The TrendySocialite-

 

In this blog post, I want to honor one of the strongest Black Female Artist of this generation.  Say what you want about Beyonce, but even fellow female artist Adele, had to give respect where respect is due.  During her Grammy Award acceptance speech, she stated: “…the way that you make me and my friends feel, the way you make my black friends feel, is empowering.”  She (Adele) was talking about the Album “Lemonade”.  I have to admit that, indeed that album was by far the best call to the world that Black Women are a force NOT to be reckoned with.  With “Formation” she served notice to ALL that she loves her family exactly as they are… And herself, too. Radical. Self. LOVE.

With that said, Bey came under fire (again) about her Madonna-like image and the display of her very much pregnant body.  So clearly they did not get the message in Lemonade.

Psalm 139:14 says: “I thank you because I am awesomely made, wonderfully; your works are wonders -I know this very well. (Complete Jewish Bible Version); the King James Version says “I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well..  Either way, Our Creator designed us as Black women so well, that other ethnic groups and race, go through changes to achieve what God gave us naturally.

“Historically, black women’s bodies have been utterly disrespected. We nurtured and fed other race’s children from our breasts. We were raped and bore children for slave masters. And yet, were made ashamed of our bodies, our curves, our blackness.
We were treated as concubines and receptacles for a man’s seed–and frankly, sometimes we still are. Other races are consistently celebrated and heralded for motherhood. Black women are not–definitely not consistently.  
Beyoncé’s performance was a declarative statement. Black women carry and give life beautifully. And that is NOTHING to be ashamed of.
I am a Christian. I am fearfully and wonderfully made–in God’s image. And that includes my blackness. And that includes my femininity. Psalm 139:14 can’t just apply to whom and when you want. I celebrate all the parts of who I am–not just the parts that feed others’ needs or makes them comfortable. *walks away*” –Adeea Rogers of TrendySocialite-

And I concur!

 

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The Resurrection of Dominique

On Sunday March 27, 2016, I celebrated the Resurrection of my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. There are somethings in my life that are dead and buried. Things that need to stay there. Or so I thought.   You see, along with those “things” were also hope, dreams, promises, destiny and purpose.  Buried beneath the molestation and sexual assault,  were my destiny and purpose. Beneath the storms of my life, were my hopes and dreams. Every thing to me seemed like an even plane, defined as a level of existence, thought and development. I did not understand that I was born to live, not just exist.  Buried beneath the confetti of life, lies Dominique. Born Patrice Dominique Kemp. Patrice, as I soon discovered was who and what people thought I should be.  I was trapped in a bubble that was created by others.  My life became a metaphor.  I even looked at the characters of the Bible to find that one person whose life mirrored my own.  The more I searched, the angrier I got because God had I plan, and seemed impossible to achieve.

Hiding behind “The Veil” 

Patrice meaning “Noble”, is the “veil” that I hid behind.  This “veil” is defined as having a power of expression, either in speaking or writing. Being in favor for studying and research. I am clever, clear-sighted and intellectual. I don’t like to let others know my true feelings. I am bold, independent, inquisitive and interested in research. I know what I want and why I want it.  I desire to inspire and lead, to control other’s affairs. I am giving, courageous and bold, action oriented,energetic and strong willed. I want to make a difference in the world, and this attitude often attracts me to cultural interests, politics, social issues, and the cultivation of my creative talents. However, none of this made me happy, because I knew I was still so much more.  I have been on a mission to unveil the person God created me to be. To peel off the layers of hurt, pain, and circumstances of my life. I hid my hurt, pain, anger, low self-esteem behind this veil.  It was safe, and it protected me from facing my destiny.  In my alone time, I would often look in the mirror and try to find “greatness”,  that I could not see, and yet, knowing it is there, waiting on me.

What’s in a Name?

The day I decided to use Dominique was the moment God spoke to me and said: “It’s time to remove the veil, look deep within and break free.  It’s my name right? Not some fictitious name to hide my true identity. It’s a redefinition of who I am, who God has called me to be.  Origin of the name Dominique: Bestowed upon both females and males in France, Dominique is from the Latin Dominicus (Belonging To God), which is derived from dominus (a master, a lord).  There you have it!  I am a true child of God.  I belong to God!   I have always loved my name Dominique.  I always knew that it was powerful.  I was inspired to write my very first blog 8-1…The First Day of My New Beginnings.  August 1, 2015 is the day my name was changed to “Dominique.” The implication is that we all receive “names” from the world–Patrice Dominique. However, God has a promise for our lives as well, and His name for us is different. It expresses our personal relationship with God and the high value He places on us.

For I know the plans that I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11 NAS

When God is ready to bring His Chosen in to their true destiny, he changes their names and their identity. For example, Abram became Abraham, Sarai became Sarah, Jacob became Israel.

AbrahamGenesis 17:4-6 “4“As for Me, behold, My covenant is with you, And you will be the father of a multitude of nations. 5“No longer shall your name be called Abram, But your name shall be Abraham; For I will make you the father of a multitude of nations. 6“I will make you exceedingly fruitful, and I will make nations of you, and kings will come forth from you”…

Sarah: Genesis 17:15-16 “15Then God said to Abraham, “As for Sarai your wife, you shall not call her name Sarai, but Sarah shall be her name. 16“I will bless her, and indeed I will give you a son by her. Then I will bless her, and she shall be a mother of nations; kings of peoples will come from her.”… 

Jacob: Genesis 32:28
Then the man said, “Your name will no longer be Jacob, but Israel, because you have struggled with God and with humans and have overcome.”

Dominique redefined me.  I use the name primarily for my business and “Unveiled by Dominique” which will soon launch as a platform, a movement for women to remove the veil to reveal their strength.  Dominique symbolizes my Destiny, my Freedom, My Purpose.  Dominique is symbolic of the resurrection of those things that was once considered dead. When people call me Dominique, there is a call to action that is awaken inside of me, a story that needs to be told, my story… Dominique is a legacy in the making.  Dominique makes a bold statement to the world that I truly belong to God and because of that I have survived what only God knew I could handle.  Only God can bring the dead things back to life.

There is a song that I love, that speaks to my resurrection. “wasted enough, of my DESTINY, trying to please those who really didn’t care about me, But I’m trusting You, for you hold the plans just FOR MY LIFE”.  In my desperate need for a change, I am giving it all to God so I can live FREE!!!

For My name means “I am Noble” and “I Belong to God”!

Eyes have not seen, Ears have not heard, neither has it entered into the heart of man the things that God has prepared for me.

Removing the veil.  Follow me and watch Him do it!

Dominique

 

The Fire Became a Flame-Goals for November 2015 

  
Distractions can be masked as busyness and busyness can cause a lack of focus. I lost focus! And the “unveiling” took a back seat to the challenges of life. I knew I had to write, because I kept seeing images of black women, other blogs about the state of black women, organizations being founded about girls of color, all related to the purpose of Unveiling the Beauty Within.

Yet, the very thing a sought out to do with this blog, is the very thing I allowed to be “caught up in”.

In a Facebook group/Periscope group called #BlackBizScopeChallenge, day 7 for the month of November was ” your plan for the week.” As I surfed through My FB Groups, I came across a post about #BlackGirlsBlog and ironically, this group too was having a Challenge and day two was “What are your goals?” Well if that was not a clear message from Heaven to re-group and re-focus, I don’t know what is.

I scoped about my plan for the week, but I have goals before 2016 comes in.

My goal as we near the end of 2015 is to get back to building my faith. Without doing that, everything I am about to list will be of no value. I have drafts for this blog that I have written in Evernote that I need to publish. They will all be published this week. I have newsletters that I need to put out, all written in my head, that needs to be sent out! That will also go out this week. On October 25th, my co-founders and I launched Ladies That Brunch NYC….An Empowerment Movement and it is my job to follow up.  I have not yet done so, but I will this week.  I need to update my business website http://www.kissmenatureshop.com and really push my brand out there now that I am happy with the look, the packaging, ect. 

I need to complete this challenge because it will make me accountable to the immediate goals and put into perspective the other goals that I have. This is why I am convinced that finding this group was by Divine Design, not by chance. Jeremiah 29:11 says “For I know the plans I have for you…” 

Who doesn’t want more traffic to their blog? For me, getting more traffic to my blog means getting a message out to women of color that we can come behind the veil, that we all share a story, a situation, a similar pain. I started this blog started because I needed to be free from the “mask” that hid my pain and my hurt; childhood event that began the process of building a wall.  The “veil” that covers the insecurities that plague women of color like colorism, sexism, and the need to be strong when we really want to vulnerable-not weak! To exhale from who we are expected to be, and be who we are-Self Identity! 

My Goal for Unveiling the Beauty Within is to make it a movement that goes beyond the blog. And to do that, stories need to be told and they can only be told (for now) by creating more content.

My Goal is to EXCEED My Goals set for November! 

What are your goals?

 

A Look Back…The Genesis of the Veil

On June 23, 2013, Oprah did a PHENOMENAL job at uncovering the “Untold Story” of Colorism in America . The documentary Dark Girls is a fascinating and controversial film that goes underneath the surface to explore the prejudices that dark-skinned women face throughout the world. It explores the roots of classicism, racism and the lack of self-esteem within a segment of cultures that span from America to the most remote corners of the globe. Women share their personal stories, touching on deeply ingrained beliefs and attitudes of society, while allowing generations to heal as they learn to love themselves for who they are.

But she didn’t stop there.  In Bill Duke’s Light Girls, real women share their emotional testimonials of what it’s like to be told you’re not a “real black person.”

So here we are, a race of people of the African Diaspora, divided by “whose pain is greater”, yet facing the same feelings of nonacceptance by their own people. On the one hand, its the “Dark Girls” saying “I don’t want to be called Black” and on the other “Light Girls” feeling “not Black enough”.

Dark Girls: A World Television Premiere Event – First Look (Click to view), for me cracked opened the “Pandora’s Box” of the suffering I endured growing up the only “Dark Skinned” on my maternal side of the family.  I remember my Grand-Mother, whom I loved dearly, and still do (she passed in 2002) telling me that I was “stupid” for taking after my father.  She made me purse my lips, in an effort to conceal my full lips, and pinch my nose to “re-shape” them to that of European features.  She even told me once, that if someone at school called me “Black” I was to respond “well, you are white like snow.”   Even at 6 years old, and in the first grade, I could rationalize how that was a bad thing.  Here is the caveat: my best friend in the first grade was an Italian girl, with blond hair and blue eyes. We were thick as thieves. We both had staring roles in all of the school plays, we ate together at lunch; we even shared lunch…So I waited for her to call me “Black”. She never did.  We were friends up until High School, when the reality of racism in America split us apart.  We were on the bus, going to school together, as we always did. As we sat next to each other talking and giggling, a group of African American girls said “of course it would be the blackest of us to hang out with white girls” Wait what?!? That statement stuck with me the entire day.  It was then that I looked at the the students in my new school and saw the segregation of race and culture.  I stopped being her friend, because I was in search of this new “BLACK” identity.

See I grew up on the heels of “Black Power” in America. The Afro-puffs tied neatly and tight with “bo-bo’s”. “Black is Beautiful” was in everyone’s home.  “The Blacker the Berry, the Sweeter the Juice” was our theme song. I left the US and resided in the French West Indian island of Martinique.  I don’t remember being judged by the color of my skin. Everyone loved my chocolate smooth skin, unblemished and even.  That’s what they would say. Yes, as an adult looking back at it now, there was colorism.  The people on the Island were defined as follows: “Negresse”, “Couli” and “Mulatte”, in plain English: “Negro”, “Indian” and “Mulatto”.  Still, to be a “Negresse” was the face of Madinina.

The liberating moment for me as an adult came when Mr. Barack Obama became the First African American President of the United States of America.  But for me, it so much more that him being president, it was his wife, the First Lady of the United States of America! She is a beautiful Woman of Color and dare I say “Dark Skinned”  When it was announced that President Obama won the election, the first thing I said was “SHE LOOKS LIKE ME!!!!!!!!!!” “SHE LOOKS LIKE ME!!!!!!!”  I was yelling all through out the house.  Though I didn’t express it, subconsciously, First Lady Michelle Obama dispelled every wrong thing that society saw in “my skin”.

So the real question bears answering: is America that damaged by the devastation of slavery that even centuries after its abolition, we are still not able to see ourselves as beautiful beings?

In response to this, there is a new organization on the rise, that is ready to attack this issue head on, starting with our little girls.  Beautiful Black Butterflyz™ recognizes the the need to empower women does not start at womanhood, but in childhood.  We must begin to empower and instill in our little girls the beauty they possess. Traci Spencer and Aisha Harris are the Founders of Beautiful Black Butterflyz™, an organization that promotes self-love, self-acceptance, self-worth and beauty to our young girls of color.

As Beautiful Black Butterflyz™ prepares for its official launch in January 2016, Unveiled By Dominique will partner with Beautiful Black Butterflyz™ to help spread this initiative of promoting love for our skin, and healing the deep wounds in our community for women both young and wise.

Let the “Unveiling” begin.